In Memory Of Candy Lederer 1-8-2010

The photo above is of my very beloved Schnauzer named Candy.

I brought her home in November 1999, after my wife begged me for

"this dog" my sister had. I had no desire to have a dog in the house at the

time.

I brought her home anyways that night. It didn't take me long to fall in love

with her!!! Three days later I was hooked! I was amazed at how kind she was, &

how smart too. She learned to potty outside very quickly. She also loved & understood

her parents very well too.

You could be watching T.V. with a plate of food in your lap. Get up & leave the room,

& Candy would never touch your food! She wanted to, believe me; but she knew YOU

didn't want her too. She loved you enough to....listen.

My wife & I have very much enjoyed over ten years with Candy. Outside of the regular

Vet visits & so forth, she hardly ever had any health issues....until last month (Dec 2009).

Last month, she began throwing up. This was (at the time) not a big scare to us, because

she had a history of throwing up....on occasion.

Years ago, we had inquired about her throwing up "ever now & then" & we're told

not to worry too much. She could just have eaten something outside that made her sick,

or she could "have a simple virus".

She would throw up & then be fine (?) for weeks. Well, last month; she got real sick &

wasn't acting right at all. She even appeared to have had a seizure...threw up...& wouldn't go

outside....she couldn't.

All she could do was stand there. Her little head tilted to the side; as if she was losing her balance. I pet her & held her close. I phoned the wife to RUSH home!!!

My wife took her to the vet the next day (Monday). The vet said Candy was in bad shape.

He said he "found a growth the size of an orange on her spleen". He told us "this was most likely

the cause of her throwing up.

He did surgery the following Friday. Removed the growth. (We didn't to a biopsy on this growth because, we felt "if it was cancer, what could the vet do anyways?"). Candy stayed the night

at an emergency type facility for pets. They monitor pets who have just had surgery &

administer care, food ect. They also evaluate the animal to see if they need to return to

the vet again.

Candy appeared to be okay & we took her home the next day (Sat). She had stitches, &

we had to be careful that she didn't go up or down any stairs. THIS was very hard to

police. Candy ended up using the stairs (once in a while). I tried my best to monitor this.

The vet told us to bring her back in for routine inspection after two weeks.

She had blood work & all was.....fine. It appeared that the surgery saved our dog.

The vet did warn us however, that she could suffer internal bleeding & that if this happened there would be "nothing they could do" (he told

us this after her surgery when we were there to transport her to the

emergency facility). Again though, when he checked her two weeks later she was okay.

Candy remained at home with her little sister "Sugar". I had HOPED for two more years with

Candy. I felt like the surgery AND the $1,300 cost was worth it, to gain this! Well, she never threw up again (accept maybe one time). She was happy, ran around, barked, ate her food ect.

She was our "Canders" again.

We enjoyed another Christmas with Candy! We were grateful to have another one with her.

On Friday, January 8th 2010 I called my wife from work on my lunch brake. I do this everyday.

I called her cell. I assumed she was at home. She was at the vet's again!

She said "Honey, Candy's sick again". I felt my heart stop. I decided not to panic. Candy will be fine. The growth is G-O-N-E. It's winter & she's just got a virus.

I told my wife to call me when she finds something out. (What happened? My wife was asleep in bed, with Candy at the foot of the bed. I was at work. My wife said she was awakened BY Candy tapping her head in an attempt to wake mommy up! My wife "halfway looked up...still half asleep" & asked Candy to go back to sleep. Candy did. Later on, my wife KNEW Candy wasn't well...and rushed her to the vet. Candy wasn't throwing up either).

An hour later my cell phone rang. I was busy working, but KNEW I must answer that call!

It was my wife. Her words: "you need to leave work right now & come to the vet's office".

My wife said Candy was bleeding internally!! She said we will have to put her to sleep.

MY WORST FEAR had come to pay a visit. When I arrived, the vet was busy. My wife & Candy were in a quiet room. I walked in & Candy heard daddy's voice. She came running for me! She was hding under the bench my wife was sitting on (talking on her cell). I picked her up & my wife & I loved her, petted her, kissed her, talked to her, carassed her.

I thanked her for "all the years" she gave us.

I cried.

Yes, a 46 year old man cried over having to put his dog to sleep. After the paperwork & payment was made, the vet entered the room. He had a syringe with him filled with a solution.

I picked up Candy (for the last time) & placed her on the table. She never fought at all.

This was how sweet she was. (when I would give her a bath, she would...most of the

time....just jump right in the tub, & let me wash her).

Candy looked up at me (for the last time). My wife & I sobbed & kissed Candy (for the last time).

We walked out after we were sure she was.....gone.

January 8th, 2010 10 years & a few months old.

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What angers me is I feel ripped off. I am told Schnauzers live 15 years (some have lived

for 20). Candy lived ten.

The growth never returned. The vet assumes it was cancer. He said he had siphoned

blood from her abdomen. He believed she had a pint of blood filling up there.

He said we could choose to taker her home with us, but there was a good chance

she would die before the weekend was over.

I didn't want that. I didn't want her to die in the house. I COULDN'T HANDLE THAT!

I knew I needed to "see her in the house alive" in my heart & memories of her.

I didn't want to look & say "there's where we found Candy dead". I knew I would be haunted

by that if we took her home & she did die.

Also; I didn't want to be selfish & CAUSE her to suffer longer...by taking her home.

The vet said she "probably wasn't in pain right now, but that she was very unhappy".

I was afraid "putting off the inevitable" would cause her to end up in pain & then

she could drown in her own internal blood.

We did the UN-selfish thing & put her to sleep.

She will be cremated & her ashes given to us.

I miss her & will always love her. I was planning (this hurts too) to make a video

of just her....I never got to it in time. There is no excuses. But, I DO indeed

haver her on many videos though....just none dedicated to just her.

Life must go on as death is a part of life.

Grief is the price we pay for loving. BUT IT IS WORTH THE PRICE.

Goodbye my dear Canders. R.I.P.

Daddy & Mommy & Sugar

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